Don’t Let Gratitude Hibernate

Mitch Arnold • December 27, 2023

Six months ago, sitting on my patio, enjoying the abundant sunshine and warmth, I thought to myself, “What a great time to be alive!” The sun shined from the time I awoke until nearly the time I went to bed. I could have the windows open to let the fresh air in, and didn’t have to wear warm, bulky clothes. Summer weather gave me a lot to be thankful for.


I thought about that moment last week, during the winter solstice. Now, I awake and eat dinner with darkness outside. The windows are closed shut, and I’m wearing layers, even inside. Though winter weather doesn’t inspire much gratitude, gratitude should not hibernate. We just need to look harder to find it.


That’s kind of the way it goes with gratitude. When we need it most, it’s the hardest to find. It’s easy to be grateful when everything seems to be going your way. The sun is shining. You’re warm and happy, and tomorrow is something you eagerly anticipate. But what about those days when there’s more darkness in your life than sunshine? When you feel that the world is giving you a cold shoulder, and you worry about what challenges tomorrow will bring?


That was most of 1993 for me. In 1992, I had wrapped up a successful college experience, and became a high school teacher. It was now time to cash in on my hard work and dedication. Everything was going to be like college, except with a little more money and a lot less worry about college classes. Unfortunately, most of my friends were back in college, and I started to feel a little separated from them. Then, right before Christmas in 1992, my long-time girlfriend dumped me. Suddenly, nothing seemed right, and gratitude very rarely crossed my mind. When I needed gratitude most, I simply couldn’t find it.


I lost a year of my life wallowing in a negative mindset, because I wasn’t yet skilled in the art of gratitude. Sure, family and friends encouraged me to focus on all that I had to be thankful for, but I was 23 years old and lacked perspective, so I put up a wall, and instead focused on all that I had lost. To live in gratitude, you must learn how to control your thoughts, and I wasn’t there yet.


Gratitude is precisely what we need during challenging times in our lives. Beyond what gratitude does for a person’s outlook on life, it’s also proven to reduce depression and anxiety, boost heart health and relieve stress – in other words, it’s almost the perfect antidote for the mental and physical complications we experience when we’re dealing with life’s darkness.


Fortunately for me, at the end of 1993 – almost to the day of getting dumped in 1992, I rekindled a romance with my future wife, and we’ve been going strong for thirty years. Still, I wish that I hadn’t ceded so much of that year to darkness.


If darkness inside or outside has you feeling down, consider adding gratitude to your daily routine. Before you get out of bed in the morning, think about things that you are thankful for, even consider writing them down or sharing them with others. When negativity creeps into your mind, which it invariably will, use gratitude as a shield, and watch those thoughts of gratitude crowd negativity right out of your mind. Be consistent with these efforts, and soon, gratitude will become a habit.



No matter how dark and cold it may get, don’t let your gratitude hibernate.

Don’t Skimp on Experience

By Mitch Arnold • May 25, 2026
Recently, as occasionally happens when I watch the golfers on the course behind my home, I caught myself thinking about what it would be like to be out there again. Only this time, I also thought about the cost of golf, and began calculating how much I’ve saved by not golfing over the past 20-some years. Of course, I would rather golf than have the money I saved by not golfing, but due to a physical disability that increasingly limits my life, that isn’t an option. Thus, instead of fretting about something I can’t change, I comforted myself with math and tested my mastery of the positive explanatory style . With green fees, cart and the obligatory cold beverages, I estimated that each round would have cost me around $75. If I got out twice per month over five months of relatively nice Nebraska weather, I would golf approximately ten rounds per year, for a cost of $750. Multiply that by 20 years, and I’ve saved $15,000 or the cost of a pretty nice motorcycle. I used to ride motorcycles too, but haven’t been able to do that in more than 30 years. If I were still riding motorcycles, I figure that I would have probably had at least two during that time. Factoring in taxes, insurance and maintenance, I estimate that I’ve saved nearly $50,000 by not riding motorcycles for the past three decades. I also haven’t used a comb or paid for a haircut in nearly 30 years. However, unlike golf and motorcycles, that has nothing to do with my disability and everything to do with my genetics. Still, by avoiding monthly haircuts at $20 a pop, I’ve been able to save over $7000. I share this exercise with you not to try to talk you out of spending money on the things that bring you happiness, quite the opposite actually. You should absolutely do the things you love while you still can. In almost all cases, the money you spend on experiences is an investment in your life, and you owe it to yourself to get the most out of life that you can. Most of us, at some point in our lives, will lose the ability to do the things that once brought us happiness, and all that we will have left will be the memories. When that happens, we should cherish the memories of all that we have experienced, and look for other outlets to enhance our lives. Travel now fills the gaps once occupied by golf and motorcycles. With the help of my wife and some incredibly supportive friends, I’ve been able to visit some remarkable places like Charleston and Nashville, and enjoy unforgettable experiences, like a Green Bay Packers football game and the NCAA Final Four. Admittedly, travel gets a little more difficult each year, but that only increases my urgency to do more of it and enhances my gratitude of what I can still do, because I know that, some day, if I live long enough, I’ll be calculating the money I’m saving by not travelling. Television writer and producer Taylor Sheridan agrees, as you can see in this clip from the Paramount+ series, The Madison. https://www.youtube.com/shorts/tydIBHknM_s Don’t wait until everything is in order to invest in experiences. Accept the golf invitation. Buy the motorcycle. Take the trip. Prioritize making memories while you still can, because some day, those memories are going to be more valuable than whatever you have in the bank.

Looking Past Flying Frauds and Gym Goons

By Mitch Arnold • April 19, 2026
I’ve seen miracles occur at 30,000 feet, and have been told by many Southwest Airlines agents that it’s fairly common to see people use a wheelchair to get on the plane and then walk away with no problem when the plane lands. Though I’ve tried many times, I’ve yet to experience that miracle myself. Perhaps there is another explanation. Though I try to stay upbeat and positive, and to believe that most people are genuinely good, flying tests that effort. Too often, the people who pre-board with me and jockey for the best seats in the plane upfront don’t really need to be there, and are oblivious to the needs and challenges of those who do. Many are not above exaggerating their limitations, and some are even capable of faking a disability, as long as they are first on and first off the plane. Once, on a flight to Las Vegas, I saw a young woman make a big fuss about an injured ankle that was haphazardly wrapped and even ask for an extra seat to prop up her leg. It was easy for me to see because she was in the row in front of me, where it would have been much easier for me to get up after the flight. Later that afternoon, I saw her in Bellagio, walking with not even a limp, and I tried to lock eyes with her from my wheelchair. Though I didn’t say a thing, the recognition in her face told me that my message was delivered. Most people are far more gracious and generous than these flying frauds, but there is enough of the selfish behavior that Southwest noticed, and has tried to address by eliminating open seating. Unfortunately, that makes traveling more difficult for people like me. I still get to pre-board, but I now must stand and shuffle my way to an assigned seat farther toward the back of the plane. Almost always in our society, a very small percentage of people, like the flying frauds, cause problems that adversely affect everyone else. Unfortunately, their behavior tends to distract us from truly good people. I was reminded of that at the gym the other day. I typically exercise over the noon hour during the week, and I keep my routine intense but relatively brief. My goal is to do 32 sets of weight-training exercises, over eight different stations, in 32 to 35 minutes. That means that I’m constantly moving, and don’t have time to look at my phone. At that time of day, there are many other professionals also using their lunch hour to exercise, and they follow a similar schedule to maximize results in a compressed period of time, but there are exceptions. Some people will monopolize a piece of equipment for more than 30 minutes, checking their phones between each set, oblivious to anyone else who might want to use the equipment that they’re on. On this day, a guy that I have confronted in the past about this started on a machine as I was only two sets into my workout. I tried to be cordial and wait my turn, but nearly 30 minutes and 26 sets later, when I was done with all of my other stations, he was still there, looking at his phone. Even when I tried to speed him up by asking how much longer he would be, he didn’t budge. I left the gym angry that day, though every other person I encountered was smiling and kind. That’s not how I like to live, and I was disappointed in myself for letting negative emotions dominate my thoughts. I let a very minor irritation distract me from all that was good around me, and I focused on something I couldn’t control instead of appreciating all that I could.  There are always going to be people who get under our skin, if we let them. Our job is to look past them and direct our attention to the vast majority of people who are good. It’s a much more peaceful way to live. Unfortunately, we occasionally need flying frauds and gym goons to remind us of that.